You Don’t Say—So!

Let’s start simple. Say you are at the mall, and you’re not dying of thirst, but you could use a cool drink—some sweet tea, a soda, or a latte. What do you do?

A) You fall on the floor, grab your neck, and start making sounds like a camel.
B) You use your telepathic powers to convince the guy at the Orange Julius to give you a complimentary orange slushy.
C) You commandeer a large piece of cardboard and construct a sign that reads “Will work for drink.”
D) Decide that drinking is over rated, suck it up, and go on a two-day drink fast.
E) None of the above.

Ok, you are correct. The answer is F!

This is my version of new math! The answer is you walk up to a counter, kiosk, coke machine, or water fountain and get yourself a drink. Needs = action.  You need something, and you take action to get it. Like I said in the beginning, it’s simple, right? Not so much. This works for every concept I can imagine—except for leadership.

I read somewhere that the average American spends $36 per month on the outside of his/her head on shampoo, razors, perfumes, creams, and etc… On the other hand, they spend less than $2 on the inside of their head, e. g., learning something that will significantly effect their leadership style and prowess. Those of you who regularly read my blogs know that I’m a story teller. However, this is a tough story to tell, so bear with me.

I’m 63. but closer to 64, I’m not out of shape. but I decided to go on a low carb diet. I’ve told everyone who asks that I did it because my clothes were getting tight. I was not being exactly forthcoming with my reasoning. I fly very regularly. If you’ve been tracking my travels on the website, you know it’s a lot. Recently, I was on a Delta flight out of Atlanta and I was in need of a little entertainment. I reached for the Sky Magazine; but someone had left one of those men’s magazines (not that kind—one of those muscle magazines), and I started thumbing through the pages. There he was. It kind of took me by surprise—a picture of a 69-year-old guy who looked pretty buff. He was no Arnold Muscle-nagger, but he looked pretty awesome for a 69-year-old. Small framed like me, but in great shape. Just so you know, I’m not suffering from furniture disease (my chest hasn’t fallen in my drawers yet), but he made me look bad. I stuck the magazine in my backpack and decided I was going to work on me! Needs = action! No one has stopped me and said, “Hey, Dale, you’re looking great!”, but this guy and I are working on the same goal: a better us. The secret to my success is I just said so!

Huh? Nothing happens until you say-so! Till you verbalized your dreams! I’m not that special. As a matter of fact, I’m pretty average. I just like doing extra, above, over-the-top, fantastic stuff. I was in a meeting this week where someone defended his bad service by saying, “Yeah, we suck, but we don’t suck as much as our competition.” (They weren’t in the vacuum business., either.) What was he saying? What was he claiming? He wasn’t saying so.  He was saying, “So?”  I could have said, “Well, I don’t look as good as that guy in the magazine, but I look a lot better than the guy next to me that had the body of a god–Buddha!”

We have an awesome two-day retreat that is offered in a fabulous setting at The Whitestone Inn outside of Kingston, Tennessee. It’s a four diamond resort. I train small to medium-sized companies who bring their leadership teams of 15 to 20 in for four night stays and two days of intensive training. Their leaders bring their spouses and families. Everyone or just the team members can participate in the seminar. (Or enjoy the spa or a multitude of awesome activities.)  There are personal assessments and team exercises culminating in real life-changing and life and business-altering events. We follow up at 90 and 180 day increments, keeping your team on track. I teach the participants how to say so—not to settle. One of my recent attendees, who is a serial entrepreneur and small business owner said, “I am glad you don’t charge your attendees a percentage of their growth.”  I smiled and said, “If you say so!”  Since no two seminars are the same. I wanted to give you an example of the principles of Saying So…

Saying so shows your appreciation:

Nothing builds character in people like bathing those around you with appreciation. Captain Kangaroo taught me this as a small child. If you are only pleased with someone’s actions and you don’t say so, they don’t know. Behaviors that are rewarded get replayed. The residual of this action is it will make you more joyful. It is the ultimate win-win!

Saying so makes you more confident:

Self doubt is a silent destroyer. All of us deal with self doubt when it comes to doing something new. Recently during a staff training. I asked a junior team member, who I thought was very knowledgeable, to address the group. He did a wonderful job. He told me afterward he was glad I didn’t ask him the day before. He told me he was a poor presenter. He was operating from the Say So principle. I merely pushed him into leadership by saying, “Zack, you have a great perspective on this issue! Could you tell the group?” Afterward, I told him self talk and self doubt are what holds us back from leadership. Saying so means saying out loud, “I am the only one who knows what I know!”

Saying so makes us giants:

The next time you come across a timid team mate, treat them as if they are the only person you need. Speak the things into them you would like for them to accomplish. Place them with influencers. Never underestimate your words. Giving power to others makes you a more powerful leader.

Saying so makes us courageous:

What are you most afraid of? My good friend, Dr. Farris Jordan, had a long list of fears:

Water–He couldn’t swim, so he canoed the Mississippi River.

Being alone–He hated solitude, so he hiked the Appalachian Trail alone.

Dying/Getting hurt–So he rode a Brahma bull, went skydiving, etc…

He told me his mantra was telling himself over and over that he could do it. When you confront a fear with words and saying so, fear has to back down. One of the best speakers I know let the fear of the unknown, the fear of self employment, keep him from sharing his gift for over five years. After having his position downsized, he got the courage to say so. He now shares his story with thousands!

Saying so makes us prosperous:

I have never met a single person, not one, that did not have a dream. Some brilliance, some idea, some concept, that needed to be set free.  In our Leadership Seminars at Whitestone, we have freed more people from their pinned up, pushed down, and repressed dreams. Saying so, voicing you dreams and concepts, make them come to life.  Saying so takes the dream somewhere you never thought it could go!

Saying only gives us the ammunition to believe our own PR:

Negativity and saying no (instead of so) gets in the way of possibilities, opportunities, untold fortunes, gifts, and blessings! What do you have to lose if you replace the can’ts with cans? Unfulfilled dreams, settling, small thinking–these are the fruits of not saying so.

Saying so makes it so:

What if God had only thought of the universe? What if God had only thought of the darkness and light, land and water, moon and stars. What If God had only thought of man? Only when He spoke it did it happen! Only when He said so did it become a reality.

Come join us at Whitestone, learn the true principles of leadership and prosperity. Let our staff help you set free your greatness.  The only way it can happen is for you to say so!

Reserve your spot, today!